What Jeff Bezos Tweet Can Teach You About Dating

I know what you’re thinking, is she crazy?
What can Jeff Bezos teach me about dating? 

Regardless of how you feel about the founder of Amazon, he has made life a lot easier. During the pandemic, I was able to eat thanks to Fresh Direct via Amazon and have enough toilet tissue to last for 10 months. This helped sustain me as I didn't leave my apartment at all during the pandemic and still rarely do.

During his ascent as the leader of e- commerce he was told over and over again he'd never make it. Lots of people felt he would fall flat on his face and they weren't afraid to tell him. Even more hoped that he would.
But did that stop him? We all know the answer.

Bezos’ tweet last week on Twitter was amazing.
It was profound.
It was empowering.
His tweet was,

“Listen and be open but don’t let anybody tell you who you are”.

This is something everyone should hear. It’s definitely what you need to know and remember when it comes to dating and relationships.

Listen and be open.

It’s important that you listen when you meet a man whether in person or on a dating app. But don’t just listen, listen and be open minded. There might be something that you can learn. If not about him then about yourself.

Have you ever gone on a date and because you felt uncomfortable, you talked and talked and you probably over shared.
The next time you meet a man, let him do the talking because you can find out so much quicker whether or not he's the right fit for you. You can also consider where you and he stands on certain things and you might learn something new, some new viewpoint you may have never considered.
The second part of the text is what got me.

But don’t let anybody tell you who you are.

I'll say it again, don't let anybody tell you who you are.

Now here’s the tricky part when it comes to dating and (for some people- maybe you), relationships.
Think back to some of your first dates (and eventually relationships) and how you wanted the man to like you or keep liking you. You dressed or looked a certain way because you knew it was a look he was into. Come on, we’ve all done it.

If a man tells you what he likes, that’s one thing. In the beginning we talk about out likes and our dislikes, what we're into (music, movies, types of food, trends and fashions in all types of things). It's all interesting conversation when finding out about someone. Generally, we’re looking for commonalities.

But, if he tells you what to wear on a date, that’s a flag.

You don't yet know if it's a yellow or an orange flag. You’ve got to dig a little deeper.
You know what to do about yellow and orange flags, don’t you? You proceed with caution. You ask questions to find out more about this particular man.
You do discovery to understand the context of this random...
Suggestion?
Request?
Piece of advice?
You want to know where he’s coming from, what the intention is.

Your go-to might be, "Who does he think he is? Is he some kind of controlling megalomaniac?”
Figure this out before you act impulsively and berate him, okay?
Remember the article I wrote 2 weeks ago? Be open and cautious, trusting and discerning, strong and vulnerable. One shouldn’t override the other.

This is where you get to have fun by being curious and asking questions, by uncovering what's the intent underneath.
Why did he say what to wear?

Is it because you’re going on a hike and he wants you to be comfortable?
Is it because he’s taking you to a black tie event and he wants you to feel beautiful in what you’re wearing or wants you to feel comfortable fitting in?
Are you meeting family and friends at a pool party which calls for a different look?
If so, this could make sense.

Or is this a first date?

Now if this is a first date and he’s telling you to wear a certain look (a sexy dress and heels) or asks you what you’re going to wear, I hope you’ll pause. I hope you’ll ask yourself, does this seem weird?
I hope you’ll find out his why.
Discover the reason, the intention behind the statement.

Is it because he wants you to look sexy for him?
Is it because he wants you to feel sexy for you?
Is it because he’s taking you to a really special place and all your profile pictures show you dressed very casual?
Is it because he’s taking you somewhere casual and all your profile pictures show you dressed to the nines?
Is it because he wants to fit in and he doesn’t know what to wear?

Don't go into Good Girl Conditioning and go along with it- if that's not what you want. Instead, bring out your inner Nancy Drew and grab your magnifying glass before you come to a conclusion.

When you can comfortably ask questions with curiosity instead of judgement then you can understand why he's saying what he's saying. Lots of women I know have the automatic response of defensiveness. I understand. A man telling you what to wear can be a Huge Red Flag but it doesn't have to be.

Context is everything.

Maybe he’s in the fashion field, maybe he loves fabrics and textures and clothing. Maybe you mentioned that you are not really good at putting outfits together. The real question is, does he accept you for who you are or is he trying to change you?

I’m sure you have a friend who got into a relationship and suddenly took up a particular sport or she stopped going to the gym like she used to. We all adapt and are open to changing a little bit of ourselves when we’re getting to know someone. But if you are dating or in a relationship and you’ve done a 180', look inward and ask yourself, what the hell is going on?

Bezos, tweeted, “Listen and be open but don’t let anybody tell you who you are”.

Don't let anyone tell you who you are.

Don't be like the actor, Brad Pitt. He's the ultimate shape-shifter. He morphs into every woman he's ever dated so much that it can be challenging to see who he really is.
Does Pitt allow others to shape him into what they want?
Does he prefer his dates to tell him who he is?
Does he do this because he doesn't know himself?
Click here to see the actor and the women he's dated.

Don't let this be you.
Don't let people change you.
Don't let your friends and family wonder what became of you.
Be true to yourself and ask questions to see if your date's best intentions are the same as yours.

Who knows what you thinks of Bezos?
Whatever you think of him, he gives some sound dating advice.

Date intentionally by listening, being open and knowing who you are,
Elizabeth

P.S. If you're wanting to learn more about how to be true to yourself watch this short video and if you enjoy it, please like, subscribe and comment,
Know your Core Values When Dating.